The Difference Between True Confidence and False Confidence [Episode #646]
This week’s topic is: The Difference Between True Confidence and False Confidence
This is a topic that is also in our new book, You Are More Than You Think You Are, Practical Enlightenment For Everyday Life. There is a whole chapter called You Are Confidence where I really go into this topic even deeper. And on today’s show, we’re going to be going through some really great points of value and takeaways.
We get a lot of questions about confidence and so much of it has to do with us feeling really aligned, really sure of our voice and expression of our truth. It’s easy to get sidetracked and to not feel confident. It’s easy to question ourselves if we are in our ego. We compare ourselves out in the world to what people are doing, what they look like, how much money they have, what they’re creating.
There is another way of approaching confidence, which is that over time, we start to develop this unshakable connection to the true self inside of each of us, to our energy and our uniqueness. When we start to connect more we start to shift from putting all our worth on the limited surface place and we go into this deeper energy. We then start to establish real, true, sustainable confidence. And from that comes a quality of presence where we walk into a room and there’s a different quality to our energy. People are drawn to us. More and more opportunities tend to come up. We feel more energized. We feel more sure of ourselves.
This is a very powerful tool to have on our tool belt. We want to show up and be able to create our lives the way we want to create them and so that our relationships can be more drama free and more fulfilling.
Have you been wondering about this very topic? If you want to know the answer to this question and 3 more sent in by Beauties just like you, listen now to find out!
I’m seeing so many people quitting their jobs and wonder how they get the confidence to walk away from that security. Am I missing something here where I should be reevaluating my current employment? I don’t think I have what it takes.
Nichole – Oregon
I’m so over Instagram and want to delete my account every other day. I’m never quite sure who is really living their real life. It makes me doubt myself and my life. What would you suggest Kimberly?
Jullian – Nebraska
I’ve been wanting to start dating again, after a huge breakup that happened during the start of the infamous virus. I’m just not sure when the right time is. I’m conflicted with not only how to deal with discussions around the virus but also my own self-worth. It was a mutual breakup but it has me questioning myself and if I deserve a new relationship?
Candace – NY
Do you find it easy to believe in others, Kimberly? I’m always finding myself questioning whether a person is being truthful to me or if they’re just saying what I need to hear. I’d rather they be honest with me. Any tips you can share?
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As you let go of chasing after false confidence, dynamic forces and energies are freed up. Your outer world will change to match your inner world. And it’s going to be so incredibly powerful for you when it starts to happen.
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Note: The following is the output of transcribing from an audio recording. Although the transcription is largely accurate, in some cases it is incomplete or inaccurate. This is due to inaudible passages or transcription errors. It is posted as an aid, but should not be treated as an authoritative record.
Kimberly: 00:01 Hi Beauties. And welcome to our Thursday Q&A podcast where our topic this week is The Difference Between True Confidence and False Confidence. I am very excited about this topic today. This is a topic that is also in our new book. You are more than you think you are practical enlightenment for everyday life. There is a whole chapter called you are confidence where I really go into this topic even deeper. But today on the show, of course, we’re gonna be going through some really great, um, points of value and takeaways. I’ll say here at the top of the show that we get a lot of question about confidence and so much of it has to do with us feeling really aligned, really sure of our voice of our expression of our truth. And it’s easy to get sidetracked. It’s easy not to feel confident.
Kimberly: 00:55 It’s easy to question ourselves if we are in our ego, if we are always identified with what our sickle I see. So we compare ourselves out in the world to what people are doing, what they look like, how much money they have, what they’re creating. And then there’s this other way of approaching confidence, which is over time, we start to develop this unshakable connection to the true self inside of each of us to our energy, to our uniqueness. And so when we start to connect more and more, and I can say that this is possible because this is what happened in my life. We start to shift from putting all our worth, all our identifying, you know, who we are from this just really limited surface place. And we go into this deeper energy and then we start to establish real true, sustainable confidence. And from that comes a quality of presence where we walk into a room and there’s a different quality to our energy.
Kimberly: 01:57 People are drawn to us. More, more opportunities tend to come up. We feel more energized. We feel more sure of ourselves. And this is a very powerful tool to have on our tool belt. I say that peace and equanimity, which we also talk about quite a bit here are very powerful as well. And also coming from this connection to who we are, this deeper place inside of us will give us real confide, give us real power. And so that we show up and we’re able to create our lives the way we want to create them. We have more vitality, we connect more to other people. So our relationships tend to be more drama free and more fulfilling. And so we’re excited to talk about this topic today and to get into your specific questions, because as always this Thursday show, we pull the questions right from our beautiful, vibrant community.
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Kimberly: 02:57 And so before we go further, I would like to remind you to please little request from me, please leave us a review on iTunes. If you have not yet already, which is free and easy. Your review could be one sentence, but it’s more the intention. It’s more showing up supporting the show. And so I thank you from the bottom of my heart in advance for just taking that little bit of time to do it. We know that reviews are very important in our world today. So it really means a lot. Thank you so much if you screenshot your review as well and send it over to us a reviews at mysolluna.com, we will send you our seven self-love affirmation series to get you started on your personal journey in really going deep and reprogramming any limited beliefs that still may be hanging around, weighing you down and keeping you from expanding in your life.
Kimberly: 03:47 Please also be sure to subscribe to our show and that way you don’t miss out on any of these Thursday, Q and A’s or our Monday interview podcasts as well. And finally that we are getting very close to the official book launch here. And if you haven’t yet, pre-ordered your copy of the new book. You are more than you think you are practical enlightenment for everyday life. I highly recommend that you do so in the next few days, we’ve added the special pre sale bonus that anyone that orders from January 5th to January 18th will also be entered into this chance to win one of 10 slots in a very private, wonderful, impactful V I P event that will be hosting on zoom, online with sharing and Q&A live Q&A time and discussion and live guided meditation. So it’s gonna be really, really special.
Kimberly: 04:46 And that’s a new offering that we’ve just introduced. So please be sure to get your copy before then, and that way you get access potential access to these events, as well as the book, which really, you know, know of all the books. This one is my full playbook. This one is my full heart. This one I know can impact your life the most, as far as the tools and the very specific exercises on how to create abundance, how to create your best stuff, how to work with the energy that underlines underlies everything. So you can be more magnetic, more creative, more, um, peaceful, more intuitive. And so the book is in three sections. There’s short chapters, a lot of practical information. I can’t wait for you to read it. So it’s coming out soon. You are more than you think you are. My loves isn’t that the truth.
Question #1 around the topic of: The Difference Between True Confidence and False Confidence: I’m seeing so many people quitting their jobs and wonder how they get the confidence to walk away from that security. Am I missing something here where I should be reevaluating my current employment? I don’t think I have what it takes.
Kimberly: 05:43 So can’t wait calling that out and now let us get into our show today. Let’s get into this topic, the difference between true confidence and false confidence. So let’s get right into our first question, which comes from Becca, who lives in Alabama. Hi, Becca. My love, I am so excited to be with you here virtually thank you so much for being part of our community. Thank you so much for submitting a question. And your question is I am seeing so so many people quitting their jobs, and one, I wonder how they get the confidence to walk away from that security. Am I missing something here where I should be reevaluating my current employment? I don’t think I have what it takes. So Becca sending a big virtual hug once again. Thank you so much. I love these questions. I, and I love this question in particular because of the honesty and because of the vulnerability and who amongst us has not felt that fear, that clinging, where we hold on to a job or a relationship or a situation because it is safe.
Kimberly: 06:55 So called safe because it is fam is really what’s the truth. And so it goes back to the difference between true confidence and false confidence. So true confidence is on the surface, right? So it’s where we try to control or manipulate situations. Let’s say, you know, we wanna be confident. So we keep changing the way that we look or we can keep trying to improve our hair or lose a couple more pounds, or we start to slip into conversations. Oh, you know, my investments or how big my savings account is, or I just got this promotion. We, we wanna show, we wanna be validated by all this external stuff that we can see. And at the bottom of that is fear. So confidence is connected to safety, security fear, because underneath the reason we are micromanaging controlling is because we have this fear that we’re not gonna be okay, or people aren’t going to love us, or, you know, it can touch deep down into survival.
Kimberly: 08:01 This fear of not surviving being annihilated and being annihilated, being wiped out, all of that. So the difference is that true confidence. That’s all, you know, false. It’s all shifting all the time. It’s all based on the outside. True confidence means that we connect to this inner resource, the true self, which is our formless energy. It is beyond what we look like, but it’s the stable part of us. It’s the calm part of us, the peaceful, the infinitely creative and intelligent part of us. And so the difference Becca is that when we really develop this unshakeable connection with the inside of us, with the true self, it means that real safety and security comes from the inside. It doesn’t come from anything on the outside. It doesn’t come from a job which could still change and shift, even if we’ve been there for 30 years, you know, unfortunately the world today and in corporate America, especially in big businesses, there isn’t that much loyalty.
Kimberly: 09:09 So it’s really this false sense of security about, you know, this outside stuff. And so the, so the question is Becca, walking away from a job comes from this. Um, or it, it, you know, it should come from this place of, I’m not feeling fulfilled in my job. I’m, I’m not really feeling like this is the use of my talent or my energy. So we walk away because of that confidence in that I am me. So I’m gonna find something that matches up. And so there’s a balance between being smart and, you know, we still have to, um, be rational to an extent or may it’s that we find another job before we leave this current job, or maybe we know we have a certain amount of savings we can survive and last and thrive for a certain amount of time before we need to get another job, which allows us to have the space to find something that feels really aligned.
Kimberly: 10:13 So there is that as well. But if you’re asking this question, Becca, you know, I, I would, I would counter it and say, are you happy in your job? Are you feeling fulfilled? Is this, does you feel like your purpose is coming through? You know, and the purpose is not just, it doesn’t have to be so specific. Like ever since I was a little girl, I knew I wanted to be X, Y, Z, but more that our energy we’re able to feel open and expansive and loving and creative. And all of these things are able to come through whatever our job is.
Kimberly: 10:49 And if that’s not the case, what we wanna look at here is building this connection so much to the true self, which comes from our daily morning, meta, it comes from a lot of the exercises and practices in the new book, which I’m so excited to share with you really. And just in the next week or two, it will arrive to your house if you order today. And it comes from, from this internal resource so that, you know, back, no matter what happens, let’s say quit, or you get fired or laid off or whatever it is, you have, you, you will rise up to that moment. You will find another job you will be okay. So that’s where we wanna get our safety and security from. And if that allows us to be free and non rigid, so that if something in our life isn’t really working out the way we wanted to work out, we are able to walk away in freedom, without fear knowing that something else will come.
Kimberly: 11:48 So the last part of your question, I do believe that you do have what it takes. We all have this true self resource inside of us, but it’s a shift in focus and it does take work. We do need to meditate and do the practices, but I can almost guarantee you that it is not more work per se, but more of this shift and focus. So give it a go back up, please check out our free meditations that we put out every week on the Solluna app or on the website. They’re the practical enlightenment meditations. They’re usually about seven minutes, maybe eight minutes. So try going deep into the self connection. Please read the new book, cuz I think this will really speak to you in the confidence chapter. And then remember that all external stuff that we put our safety and security in. I mean, look what happened with COVID right?
Kimberly: 12:38 It’s not gonna come from the government. It’s not gonna come from the external world. It’s gonna come from inside of us. So connect to that security. And then you can see, where am I in my job, my career, do I wanna continue? And if the answers, no, this resource will be with you and it will give you strength and direction as you walk away and find something new. So you do have a, you do have what it takes my love. You just need to focus on it and develop that connection more. So thank you so much for being part of the community and sending you so much love.
Question #2 around the topic of: The Difference Between True Confidence and False Confidence: I’m so over Instagram and want to delete my account every other day. I’m never quite sure who is really living their real life. It makes me doubt myself and my life. What would you suggest Kimberly?
Kimberly: 13:16 All right, loves. Next question. Here comes from Nicole who lives in Oregon. So hi Nicole. Again, I am so grateful that you are part of our community. Thank you for taking the time to submit a question, sending you a big warm virtual hug to my Northern neighbor. Since right now I’m gonna California. So lots and lots of love and you, right? I am so over Instagram and I want to delete my account every other day. I’m never quite sure who is really living their real life. It makes me doubt myself and my life. What would you suggest Kimberly? So thank you. My love. I think you echo frustration that is felt by many with not just Instagram, but social media in general, whether you are a TikTok person or Twitter or Facebook or whatever it is. And so this again goes back to the difference between true confidence and false confidence.
Kimberly: 14:14 If we are putting so much of our worth in the outside, how it looks, we’re gonna get pretty rocked by social media, cuz you’re gonna go on and you’re gonna see people that may be fitter, thinner, have more followers, take fancier vacations. Um, you know, like you said, who knows what people’s lives are really like, but yet people are posting this, um, like this reflection of a constructed identity, a constructed life. It’s very polished. It can be very photoshopped. So we go into, we, we approach social media from this place of true confidence. We go in with the knowing and with the intention or first of all, let’s get to knowing first and then intention. We know that this is not a place of, you know, necessarily authenticity across the board. So we go into it with a sense of lightness, like, okay, I’m just gonna have fun on here.
Kimberly: 15:21 I’m gonna look around, but not, you know, like you say, you’re doubting yourself and your life. Know my love, no social media is the ultimate cons struck. It’s the ultimate place where ego plays out in the world. So we can’t change the world. But what we do is we shift where we come from. So number one, know your intention. I’m going in here to get information, to get value, to feel uplifted, to feel connected, whatever it is, know your intention, who you are following with that intention. So if you’re connected or you know, you’re following people that are not supporting that, they make you feel bad about yourself or it’s gossipy or low vibration in any way. I urge you to go through Nicole and first do a little bit of a cleanse on Instagram or any P platform you’re on and make sure that you’re removing anything that doesn’t need to be there.
Kimberly: 16:16 We don’t have to really follow anybody. So make sure that who you are following is of service to you. It’s inspiring it lines up with your intention or you’re getting value. You’re getting information in any chosen field that you would like to pull from. Number two, don’t give all your power to Instagram or any social media. As far as time, don’t let the alerts come in all the time, make sure that you batch the times that you’re on there. It’s very specific and make sure that you meditate first. So you’re more settled. You’re more grounded in yourself and your body. So you don’t wanna go on Instagram. First thing in, in the morning before you’ve even brushed your teeth or you’re even outta bed, please don’t go in right before bed, which could keep you up. It could get your minds racing, just pick some specific times, some specific windows and put them in your calendar.
Kimberly: 17:08 So you treat it like an appointment and you treat it until, you know, you treat it that way until you really start to develop healthy boundaries with social media. And it’s sort of like, you know, set meal times and set snack times until we really start to align to a really good, um, eating and digestion schedule in our lives. We need to do that with social media. We need to do it with all forms of energy relationships, you know, screen time, you know, again, like I said, eating time, exercising, we want to set ourselves up for success. So we don’t want that. You know, especially if we’re feeling a bit more vulnerable now, Nicole, that Instagram to just be taking over our lives. So be mindful of who you’re following, know your intention, line up the people and the accounts. And maybe there’s a lot of unfollows or a lot of mutes that you need to do.
Kimberly: 18:02 And then you, um, you batch your time and you go in there with the right perspective. And if you’re listening to this and you’re like, well, it still makes me doubt myself, maybe a good time to take a social media break. Maybe just take 30 days or so 40 days just get off it, work on yourself, meditate, connect to your true self, find your real sense of true confidence. <affirmative> you know, again, the practices in the book are really powerful in this way. And I can say for myself that, you know, we’re all works in progress. We’re all moving along this journey into getting to this point of, um, full rooted. I’m connected to my true self all the time, but we dip in and I out and the percentage of time that we’re an ego and the percentage of time that we are in true self does shift as long as we create some consistency with our meditation and our practices.
Kimberly: 19:00 And so I can say for myself that my level of true confidence connection now versus five years ago is exponentially more <affirmative>. And what that gives me is so much more peace, more concentrated energy. Think about the time you waste looking around, seeing what other people are doing, wondering if you’re not good enough, feeling bad, this, you know, this bad feeling that’s that paralyzes you. So you don’t really wanna write emails. You don’t feel like do doing anything at that moment. So just think about the gift you give yourself. If you were to spend 5, 7, 10 minutes a day, developing more confidence, right? And I talk about this in the book, in this chapter specifically, it’s just a few moments a day of building this muscle, this inner connection to true confidence, and it will pay you back in space. So thank you my love for your question. Thank you so much. For being honest, we’ve all felt that way. Try my tips, implement them. Keep in touch with me. Let me know how you do and sending you so much love sister. I’m very grateful for you.
Kimberly: Okay, love. So we have a short break here. And when we get back, we two more questions for you on this topic of the difference between true confidence and false confidence.
Question #3 around the topic of: The Difference Between True Confidence and False Confidence: I’ve been wanting to start dating again, after a huge breakup that happened during the start of the infamous virus. I’m just not sure when the right time is. I’m conflicted with not only how to deal with discussions around the virus but also my own self-worth. It was a mutual breakup but it has me questioning myself and if I deserve a new relationship?
Kimberly: 20:30 High loves. We are back from our break. We have two more questions for you. The first one here comes from Julian who lives in Nebraska. Hi, Julian, my love sin. You a big warm hug into Nebraska, which I imagine is quite chilly right now. It’s one of those states that I haven’t been to yet, but I am so grateful that we can be this connected, you know, across time and space. It’s just an amazing time to be alive in that way. So if you’re listening, I send you love. I send you gratitude and I’m so happy. You’re part of our unity. You’re right. I’ve been wanting to start dating again after a huge breakup that happened during the start of the infamous virus. I’m just not sure what the right time is. I’m conflicted with not only how to deal with discussions around the virus, but also my own self worth.
Kimberly: 21:24 It was a mutual breakup, but it has me question. And if I deserve a new relationship, O this is a big one. So thank you. Thank you so much. Again, I can definitely relate to this. I go into my breakup and detail in this book for the first and I wasn’t ready to talk about it for some years, but he may or may not know. My older son has a different father than my husband. And you know, we go through life and we don’t, you know, we don’t, we don’t know exactly where we were at certain points where we thought, you know, at that moment, of course the relationship made sense. We were there and now we’re here. And so as we reflect back, there’s much that we can learn from breakups. I think we can learn a lot from our prior relationships and what it, you know, what it, what we can learn about ourselves and why we pick certain partners and why, you know, things played out the way that they did when it comes to true confidence.
Kimberly: 22:37 There is this core, core, deep statement, and I’ve said it on here before, and it’s worth repeating again. And I do write this in the book. And it’s the line where Moses asked the all mighty, you know, in ancient times, what is this? What are you and the almighty replied with one statement, one powerful statement. I am that I am, I am that I am. And so this is the message. That is the truth inside of the, each of us. I am that I am. And what this means is I am here. I am alive. I am breathing. I am this unique creation from spirit. And so, yes, because of this deep, deep place of confidence and airness of who you really are. We’re not just this shell that’s gonna age and, you know, shift and change this shell that’s out there doing. And some of it works out. Some of it doesn’t know we are this incredible unique energy field. We’re this amazing creature, this aliveness inside of us. And so at any age, at any time, Julian, yes, you do deserve love. We all deserve love.
Kimberly: 24:04 And so this is a question for inside of you, are you ready for a new relationship? And I’m gonna say yes, because the first line here says I’ve been wanting to start dating again, but then it ends with, I don’t know if I deserve it. So this, this longing, this desire inside of you a, especially if you meditate and you tune in, you ask, well, why do I want a relationship? And if the answer is something like, you know, deep inside of yourself, honestly, you know, I just, I love sharing experiences. I wanna share life. I’m excited again, you know, whatever it is, that’s great. Go for it. Be aligned, be confident about it and, you know, go into the world with that place of clarity. But if it’s like, oh yeah, I just don’t feel whole or complete or good enough unless I’m in a relationship, you know, which is for me.
Kimberly: 25:03 Oh, wow. You know, I looked back and I, I tended to be in long relationships all the time. So when I had my breakup with Emerson or BU’s father, BU’s my nickname for him, you know, instead of rushing into a relationship right away, I took this period, which I talked about on my podcast with Brother Satya. Denda this incredible monk from the self realization fellowship, which is yoga, Nada’s meditation organization. I took his advice. And by the way, the podcast is amazing. You have to listen to this incredible wise, man, speak willing to it in the show notes. But he advised me to treat my home like an Arum for five months and to go deep into the self connection and my own practices and meditation, and then to emerge with this deeper sense of wholeness. And that’s exactly what happened. Julian. I went in, I took care of my son.
Kimberly: 26:01 I did my work, but I was really just focused on rebuilding myself. And then when I came out, I had, I felt whole, I didn’t feel like I was in lack or missing anything. And it was then that I, you know, some months after that, it was then that I met John, my current husband, who is everything, as far as this incredible soulmate, this beautiful connection that we have. And so I will say that, yes, we all deserve love. And so if feeling that you’re ready to date, go for it. If you feel like, okay, I need some time to really work on myself or to break some patterns, go for that too. And know that after a certain period, when you feel ready, when you feel really whole and complete, that is the time that is the ideal time to meet somebody, which leads me to, um, teasing another chapter in the book called you are whole, which has some very specific practices.
Kimberly: 26:58 And also some ways of discerning. Am I really feeling whole? Or am I in lack? And if we are in lack, that will continue to create negative patterns in our lives. It’s like cracks in the wall. They keep us from really having this beautiful, smooth, um, wall that we want in our lives. These cracks keep causing drama, disruption, ongoing breakups with the same sort of person and whatever it is. So in that whole chapter, oh, I can’t wait for you guys to read the book genuinely. And then we’ll talk about this afterwards. The whole chapter will give you the tools and practices to really feel this light inside of you, this wholeness, so that as you step forward, start to start dating again and creating new relationships. You’re coming from this deeper place of confidence. So you will attract soulmate. You will attract the right person versus if we’re disc connected on the surface to ourselves, and then we tend to attract the wrong people. <laugh> so, yes, my love, I, I say I’m very excited for you. Um, check out, you know what I’m saying, see what resonates keep in touch with me. And I can’t wait to hear about your journey as it continues. My love. Thank you so much again, for being part of our wonderful, incredible community.
Question #4 around the topic of: The Difference Between True Confidence and False Confidence: Do you find it easy to believe in others, Kimberly? I’m always finding myself questioning whether a person is being truthful to me or if they’re just saying what I need to hear. I’d rather they be honest with me. Any tips you can share?
Kimberly: 28:23 All right. And we are down into our final question. This one comes from Candace, who lives in New York. Hello, Candace, my east coast beauty. I will be headed to New York in a very short time. At least once, maybe twice for national television. One of the shows I found out is shooting remotely, but I will still be going to in New York soon. And I’m very excited to get back there, even though it’s very cold right now, I do love New York. Hope we get to meet at a future event at some point. My love. Thank you for your question. You right. Do you find it easy to believe in others, Kimberly? Hmm. I’m always finding myself questioning whether a person is being truthful to me. Or if they’re just saying what I need to hear, I’d rather, they be honest with me. Any tips you need, you can share.
Kimberly: 29:14 Yes. So love this question. There’s multiple parts of it. So I did not find it easy to believe in others. Candace. I have strong struggled with that. Struggled with trust for my entire life. There were things that happened in my childhood without getting into my, you know, too much detail, the detail isn’t so important. It wasn’t anything like, you know, big and, and traumatic and you know, isolated incidences. But, you know, there were times in all our parents, all our caretakers do their best, but sometimes things would be said, promises would be made. Things would be forgotten, you know, or over, you know, just like sometimes. And so for me, I developed this belief early on that I have like the survivor belief. Like I have to take care of myself. I need to forge this path and make myself safe. So while independence and strength comes from that, the flip side is that so does trying to control things and manipulate things around to keep ourselves safe.
Kimberly: 30:27 And so I would, you know, micromanage just, you know, all the ways in, you know, avoid certain people that didn’t feel safe. I would shut them out. I would create walls. <affirmative> it all comes from the limited ego, which is trying to keep us safe. But a lot of these practices and, um, you know, ways, these mechanisms are not effective and they’re not really helping us. So what I learned over time is that all of this, you know, control manipulation, not believing people being extremely distrustful. It all, Candace, it all comes from fear. It comes from fear of life. <laugh>, it comes fear that, you know, all fear that we’re not gonna be okay, fear that things aren’t really secure that we don’t, you know, we’re not safe, uh, you know, emotionally or, um, otherwise. And so if you’re constantly questioning, if someone’s honest, if they’re being truthful or they’re being on the surface, I think there’s a couple things here.
Kimberly: 31:41 Number one, when I emerge from this period, as I mentioned in Julian’s question after those five months, and I just felt this wholeness and I was walking around the world in a different way. I also had this deep sense of trust rise up in me that I had never had before. And then it was then Candace that I realized how distrustful I was of life life. And this trust meant that I knew that no matter what was happening around, I would be able to rise up into that moment. I would have the strength. I would have the discernment. I would be able to move forward no matter what it, and so I would ask yourself, Candice, you know, number one, if someone’s not being, you know, truthful, like why are, why are you so obsessed with not believing, you know, what’s the fear underneath it?
Kimberly: 32:39 For me, it was fear of abandonment, fear of not being good enough fear of not being loved or lable. And so when I could see that I was able to work with those energies and work with those fears and start to give myself the love and the security that I was so desperately seeking from myself every morning. Part of our morning routine, we do wanna do our regular meditations in the evening. As we close down the day, we wanna go back and connect to the true self. So we feel anchored to this place of security as we drift off to sleep. And in between, and in this new book, I share practices some of them 92nd for three minutes, just to keep recentering during the day. And what happens is we start to shift our energy in very palpable, tangible ways. So that even though we felt a lot of mistrust and a lot of fear, which is where I was just this consistency, consistency in meditation, which for me came at a point where I was so challenged with life.
Kimberly: 33:45 I didn’t think I was gonna be a single mom. I didn’t think I was gonna have to move out on my own, you know? And there was this resistance in me at first, like, uh, I don’t want life to be this way, but then it, it melted into surrender. This is when I really started to dive deeper and deeper into my practices. I’ve been meditating now for over 12 years, but it was during that time that I started to really anchor to the true self. So in some ways this new book, you are more than you think you are. I would say the Genesis of it was back then. So four years ago, it was like when this started to really click with me and it started to really build side of me. And so I would say that, you know, we want to anchor to this part of us so that let’s say we trust someone and then they end up lying.
Kimberly: 34:33 Okay. We deal with it. We move on. Or we clean up the mess we learned, but is it not better can to live in this freedom and this fullness and not play small, isn’t it better to just try? Of course we use discernment. If we think someone or someone says that someone is a, you know, um, just chronic liar, whatever it is. Okay. We’re gonna take that information and, and, you know, maybe be a little bit more aware when this person’s speaking or a little bit more, um, or alertness will be heightened, but in general maybe will be flow through life. And we meet each moment and we make the best decision we can make. And we trust people that they are saying what they need to say, or, or that, you know, they’re, they’re gonna do what they say they’re gonna, unless we have a reason otherwise.
Kimberly: 35:24 And then what happens is we just, we just move through, we start to flow. We’re not held back with all these little fears and all the ways in which we keep ourselves small and limited. So meditation is a really big part of this as well. Candice number two is looking at the fears underneath. Why are we so concerned if people are gonna lie to us or screw us over and number three. So we question, we look at the patterns and <laugh>, you know, I, sorry, this is so tough of mind for me. My loves, because I’ve just been doing podcasts, other podcasts all day and talking about the book all day. I will also say Candace, that the first chapter in the book you are fearlessness goes into some of this as well. Why are we wasting our energy, trying to control, evaluate, micromanage, get all your fears into the light.
Kimberly: 36:15 Start to look at all the ways that we, um, you know, Dodge situations, waste energy in situations because of all the fears and let that start to come out more and more and more, the consistency is important here. You know, when I talk about this isolation period, I’m not saying you need to extend it. It’s almost like extending code of it. What I’m saying is that we balance our time focused on outside. Things like talking and watching TV and all of that. And we balance that with this inner connection to our intuition. And this will also strengthen your intuition. When you connect into the true self, when you go past your thoughts, when you start to align to this deepest energy, which again is inside of all of us, every single one of us, what happens is the fear start to melt away. Our intuition increases our resilience. Our confidence comes so that if people mess up and they’re going, and that’s okay. If people lie to us, sometimes we are okay because we have ourselves and no matter what, whatever mess we need to clean up, we continue to move forward. We move forward with more freedom every single day.
Thought of the Week
Kimberly: 37:34 So I’m so excited about all of this. I’m so excited to continue our discussion over the next few weeks and months, as you guys start to get the book, and I’m excited for new questions to come after the book has published just here in the next week or two, that will come from this content. I think you guys are gonna vibe and love it so much. I’m gonna leave you with a quote of week now, which also comes from page one 14 of this book. You are confidence is the name of this chapter. And here it is, as you let go of chasing after false confidence, dynamic forces and energies are freed up.Your outer world will change to match your inner world. And it’s going to be so incredibly powerful for you when it starts to happen.
Kimberly: 38:30 Here, it is again, as you let go of chasing after false confidence, dynamic forces and energies are freed up. Your outer world will change to match your inner world. And it’s going to be so incredibly powerful for you when it starts to happen. And I cannot wait for your life. Start to unfold and expand, and your peace to grow and your BLIS and your ability to create this incredible life, which is your birthright. So here we are, you and me together connected. I’ll see you back here in a few days, but in the meantime, please take care of your beautiful, unique soul. Please check out the show notes over firstname.lastname@example.org, please. Pre-order the new book. You are more than you think you are. I promise you will be very happy that you do. Yeah. And I’ll see you back here Monday for our next interview podcast, sending you so much love so much peace and so much gratitude. Namaste.