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Realize Yourself Podcast #20: Words and Communication

Today, Kim and Tony talk about how you can transform your life and health with the way you communicate. They share tips and techniques you can use to improve your health through your words and create alignment. You’ll become aware of the communication patterns you probably learned a long time ago.

CLICK HERE to listen to the podcast now. (Or to download it.)

 

Notes:

Express Your Thoughts

We don’t always fully express our thoughts and needs or we gloss over thing. It can start to affect your health over time. In relationships (family, friendships, or romantic relationships), pleasing people can become a pattern. You may begin to say what will make them happy vs. what you really feel in order to avoid conflict.

If you’re going to a restaurant with people and everyone’s eating a certain way, you may be worried about offending them so you go along with what everyone else is doing instead of speaking up or ordering what you want with confidence.

Pressure can be created in these situations, but it’s not always about you. Be authentic and say something like, “I feel best eating this salad first,” for example. Sometimes people feel threatened because when you make a good choice and they don’t, they feel like they’re doing something wrong.

Not standing up for your truth and eating in a way that’s not really what you want, not true to you, can diminish your power.

What to Do When Your Significant Other Doesn’t Like Your Healthy Choices

Your significant other may not be ready to make changes or may not like your new healthy choices. You’re around them for a lot of meals, so communication is very important here.

Have an in-depth conversation about your feelings. Fears and limitations may have stopped that expression before and they don’t know how you feel, so they may not be as respectful or accommodating about your feelings because they don’t know what they are.

You have to be very direct and honest without being confrontational or causing friction. If you don’t talk, it can cause resentment. Tell them you’re working on yourself, your energy levels, and feeling better, and ask for their support.

Try “When you say ________, I feel ________” so they realize the impact of their words.

Having this conversation allows you to see if your relationship is based on good communication and gives you a chance to grow together. Being able to communicate allows you to make shifts and changes.

Communication and the Realize Yourself Process

Working on something dietary can be the first, easiest step in the Realize Yourself process. It’s tangible, and as you start to voice your needs as far as what you want to give to your body, how you want to create this healthy lifestyle for yourself, it can lead to a fusion of creative power. That creative power can build and lead to an impetus of clarity that allows you to create what you want in other areas of your life. But it has to start with how you voice your opinions on your diet and health.

Communication and Fear

Fear can make it difficult to say what you want. There’s fear of being alone or not finding anyone else, for example. There are lots of social fears around being alone (like not having a date for a wedding or not having someone to come home to after work).

It’s better to be single than to be with the wrong person. You repress more. You need to be able to be really authentic and express yourself completely in order to have a totally healthy, happy life. We’re all unique, beautiful people. Celebrate that uniqueness, don’t be blocked. Blocked verbal communication begins to create blocks all through your life (sleeping problems, skin breakouts, softer body from eating more, etc).

You may not have to end the relationship, but you need to feel heard within your relationship and communications need to shift. It can be shifted to something better if both people love each other and want to evolve. Set an example by expressing yourself so that they feel free to express themselves, too.

The same thing goes with friendships. Negative comments from friends can create fear around your making healthy decisions. Be strong and remember that you know a lot more than they do about what your body needs. If you don’t take a stand it’s inauthentic and unhealthy for any type of relationship. When you need to respond to a negative comment, use clarity and firmness, and make it about you (“I feel good when I eat this”) so it doesn’t sound like you’re judging them.

If someone’s curious about your choices, point them in the right direction to do some reading or offer a few facts, but don’t go overboard. There’s no need for a debate.

Tips for Choosing Your Words Wisely

  • Don’t let your words become robotic (the same answer to every “What’s going on?” or “How are you?”) or talk with no power behind your words because you’re uncomfortable with silence. There’s creative power behind your words, so choose them carefully and be conscious of what you’re saying and reinforcing.
  • Don’t voice every negative emotion or opinion all the time regardless of the situation. Still be selective and considerate. As you become more aligned, you’ll know what you should say more often.
  • Having some silence is good so you can become more aligned.
  • Communication can be an aspect of evolving in the Realize Yourself process. Communicate on a deeper level with yourself, a higher power, and everything beyond yourself through silence.
  • Be honest and authentic with yourself and others about what your needs are. You have power in choosing the best food sand creating an environment that’s healthy.
  • Exercise compromise of course, but speak up about your wants and needs. Standing up for yourself that way translates into other parts of your life and relationships. Everything is interrelated.
  • Communication leads to manifestation. Be conscious of what’s coming out of your mouth.

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