This week’s topic is: How to Live Free of Comparison
Living free of comparison is easier said than done in our world, which is so focused on imagery and social media and it is easy to compare. As we know, this can lead to suffering and to feeling that we’re not enough. Comparison leads to feeling that we’re scrambling to be better or get better results. We can’t really enjoy where we are.
Let’s face it, comparison never ever feels good, even if we feel better than someone. We have this air of superiority, which doesn’t last, and then makes us feel separated. And if we feel less than, of course, there’s all sorts of self-worth and self-esteem issues that are also tied with that.
This is something I’ve struggled with myself and have really focused on overcoming. I’ve made progress in this area and am excited to share what’s worked for me.
Have you been wondering about this very topic? If you want to know the answer to this question and 3 more sent in by Beauties just like you, listen now to find out!
I’m starting my own website but get discouraged everytime I see another site that has the same idea and I start comparing. I know it’s not healthy and it stops me in my tracks. Any tips on how to stop this cycle from happening?
Charlotte – Kansas
Even during Covid, it seems the Jones’s next door are always trying to brag about their home and cars. It’s shocking how this is even a thing. Do you have any suggestions on how to ignore them, without “ignoring” them, if that makes sense?
Violet – Rhode Island
I’m always comparing the worst of what I know about myself to the best assumptions that I tend to make about others. Have you ever dealt with this Kimberly? Any advice?
Chloe – Washington
A colleague just got promoted for a position I was also interested in. I can’t help but compare myself to her work skills and why I wasn’t chosen. How can I get past this hump so I can move forward and not dwell on negative thoughts about myself?
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Kimberly: Hi Beauties and welcome back to our Thursday Q&A podcast where our topic today is How to Live Free of Comparison. Easier said than done in our world, which is so focused on imagery and social media and it is easy to compare. But as we all know, that leads to suffering. It leads to feeling that we’re not enough. It leads to always feeling that we’re scrambling to be better or get better results, and we can’t really enjoy where we are. So today’s show I think is a big one for all of us.
Kimberly: This is something I have also struggled with myself and something that I’ve really focused on overcoming. And I can say today with honesty that I have made progress in this area. I’m so excited to share with you. What’s worked for me. Because let’s face it, again, comparison never ever feels good, even if we feel better than someone. We have this air of superiority, which doesn’t last, and then makes us feel separated. And if we feel less than, of course, there’s all sorts of worth issues and self-esteem issues that is also tied with that.
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Kimberly: I can’t wait to get into our show today. Before we dive fully in, I just want to give a quick shout out or a quick reminder to please leave us a review on iTunes, which is free and easy and just a wonderful way to support the show. And please also be sure to subscribe to our show. We all know how busy life gets, how much is going on, how much we’re managing on a day-to-day basis. So with subscription, you don’t have to think about it. You just have access to all our shows week by week, and you can listen to them in your own at your own convenience.
Kimberly: You can click the subscribe button on iTunes or Spotify or wherever you listen to our podcast. All that being said, let’s get into our topic today, how to live free of comparison. I think that there is something in the title here, freedom, which is also what enlightenment is really about. It’s living a life where we are awake to our own infinite incredible unique nature and we are free. We are liberated. Moksha, the Sanskrit word for liberation. When we are tied to always looking around and comparing ourselves, we are no longer free.
Question #1 around the topic of: How to Live Free of Comparison: I’m starting my own website, but I get discouraged every time I see another site that has the same idea and I start comparing. I know it’s not healthy and it stops me in my tracks. Any tips on how to stop this cycle from happening?
Kimberly: We are the subject of these feelings of inadequacy and competition, which really is a form of separation from our brothers and our sisters. And it pulls us away from our true nature, which is unity and oneness. And that never feels good. It never feels good to step away from our true nature. This is a topic that’s related to our inner peace, to our focus and our life, to our ability to stay present, to our ability to really tap into the joy that’s always available to us. Now, our first question comes from Emily and she lives in Germany.
Kimberly: She writes, “I’m starting my own website, but I get discouraged every time I see another site that has the same idea and I start comparing. I know it’s not healthy and it stops me in my tracks. Any tips on how to stop this cycle from happening?” Thank you so much, Emily, for your question. This is something that I think most all of us can relate to.
Kimberly: Whether it’s a business idea or a group we want to start maybe or social thing or something with our kids or career wise whatever it is, it’s easy to look around and to say, “Oh, there are so many other businesses doing this, or there are so many products of XYZ. What do I do? This person’s doing this, and this person’s doing that.” The big message here, Emily, is to really remember that when we go on a certain level, it’s like we’re picking out a million apples from the store and you’re like, “Oh, look at all these infinite apples. They all look the same.”
Kimberly: But with us humans, the truth is… And with apples, but definitely with us, is that we are all completely unique, like a unique blueprint that comes into the planet, comes into the universe and can never be fully replicated. Yes, people may be pursuing the same ideas and they may have the same business strategies and market shares or whatever. When you get to that level, you can say, “Sure, there are people doing the same thing,” but where no one can compete with you is that you are unique.
Kimberly: You bring a unique essence and an energy and a way of doing things that no one else can do. What I would encourage you to do, Emily, is to lean into that instead of looking around. Sometimes you can do market research and you can say, “Oh, this person’s using this whatever,” shopping cart service, whatever it is, Shopify or whatever. You can say, “Oh, look, this may be a good technology tool for me.” But you have to really keep it non-emotional and it’s really just straight research.
Kimberly: That’s where you leave it as far as looking around and seeing and gathering information. But then what I want you to lean into is your unique attributes and strengths and what you bring to this business that’s completely unique. It could be your perspective, the tone of your voice, the language that you use on your website. If you’re doing video, that’s completely unique the way that you connect to people.
Kimberly: Where we can really go the farthest is when we foster and really strengthen our relationship with our unique selves. And that’s what I have found along my journey. My best books, my best work is always when I feel the most connected to myself, because we’re never going to be our most powerful if we’re trying to look like someone else or be like someone else. But if we really lean into our uniqueness, that is the gift. That is the tool that stands apart from anyone else.
Kimberly: What we want to do is we want to meditate and find stillness and time to journal and self-reflect and all these different practices that we talk about in our lifestyle, in our Four Cornerstone lifestyle, which is food, body, emotional well-being, and spiritual growth. We really want to lean into this. Again, I was on a podcast yesterday actually. I’m the guest podcast for someone else’s podcast, and I was explaining about our cornerstones. And she said, “Oh, spiritual growth.” She goes, “Maybe that turns people off.”
Kimberly: And I said, “Sometimes people correlate spirituality with religion or dogma or just polarizing thoughts or beliefs. Whereas the way we use it in our community is really acknowledging that there’s a spirit. There’s a soul inside of us.” And when we really strengthen our connection with that, it really helps us to build our confidence and to build our relationship with our uniqueness, and therefore to naturally shed and start to naturally let go of comparison. It’s really powerful to do.”
Kimberly: And at the same time, strengthening that relationship with our inner selves helps us to really tune in and amplify our best most unique ideas and bringing our energy into whatever we’re doing. And again, that is beyond comparison. That’s really the most powerful thing that you can do. So again, Emily, you can do market research. You can look around. You can see what’s going on, but ultimately I would encourage you to spend your own time focusing on elevating your unique attributes and breathing into them.
Question #2 around the topic of: How to Live Free of Comparison: Even during COVID, it seems the Jones’ next door are always trying to brag about their homes and their cars. It’s shocking how this is even a thing. Do you have any suggestions on how to ignore them without “ignoring” them, if that makes sense?
Kimberly: Like you’re breathing into the embers of the fire inside of you and really tuning into that and bringing that out more in your work. You will see that you don’t have to worry about comparison the more that you do that. Thank you so much for your question, my love. Sending you a big, huge virtual hug out there to Germany. All right, our next question comes from Charlotte and she lives in Kansas. She writes, “Even during COVID, it seems the Jones’ next door are always trying to brag about their homes and their cars. It’s shocking how this is even a thing. Do you have any suggestions on how to ignore them without “ignoring” them, if that makes sense?” Charlotte, this is a big one. I think when we are surrounded by people who derive their sense of self, their sense of worth, and their sense of self-esteem by physical objects, by material objects that can be seen and witnessed and picked up, what we do in this case is, first of all, to understand that that is the motivation for someone that’s constantly talking about money or bringing forth their material items to show.
Kimberly: And again, this comes from a deep need to be seen and to be loved and to be accepted and to be validated. Somewhere along the way, these so-called the Jones’ next door, maybe they learned that in their childhood. Maybe that’s one of the reasons that they attracted each other as a couple because they have that shared belief. It turns into a whole lifestyle and a way of living. What we can do is, first of all, we can acknowledge that that is really the root of that behavior.
Kimberly: And when we do that, we notice it. But instead of judging it and sort of saying, “Oh my God, that is just so gross,” which maybe on some level it just doesn’t feel like a classy thing for us to do. But instead of having those judgy thoughts, which are natural for all of us at a certain point, we can start to transcend those thoughts and bring love and compassion. Ultimately, we all want love and acceptance, and it is the motivation for doing all the things we do, whether it’s meditation or connecting with our community or showing off our material cuts.
Kimberly: Some of these ways of connecting to love may not resonate with us, and certainly they don’t all resonate with me. And I get that. We all struggle with judgment, I think, to a degree. But what I try to do is I bring that consciousness… I want to say higher consciousness. It’s not that we’re higher or better than anyone else, but it means that we’re looking beyond just the surface behaviors. We’re going to the higher place. We’re looking to the soul. We’re looking to connect beyond all the behavior and really connect with others.
Kimberly: And when we do that, we can see, “Oh, this person’s behavior, while it seems shocking on the surface, is really about trying to connect with other people so that they feel validated and loved and respected.” The reality is we can have all those things. We can give those things to ourselves, and then people see them more and more just by us showing up and knowing that we are worthy of love and attention, and we are worthy of validation. We don’t need to have cars and fancy objects. But if someone is at that place, we bring love. We try to see them. You said ignore them without ignoring them.
Kimberly: You don’t have to reinforce, “Oh my gosh, your car is so amazing,” because that sort of validates their behavior. What I would do is I would look to connect with them on a human level. When you run into them, looking at them in their eyes and saying, “How are you doing? How are you really doing? What’s going on with you?” And yes, if they bring up the stuff, you can acknowledge it, but you bring it back to what’s real. You bring it back to human connection.
Kimberly: And that way you are seeing them and you are also not playing into this game team of material objects, which doesn’t resonate with you, of course, from your question, and it doesn’t resonate with me either. I have also been around a lot of people with a lot of wealth and materialism, and I just don’t connect to them on those lines. We can always find a human place, a deeper place to connect with people. When we do that, it takes it out of comparison. It takes it out of materialism and really brings it back to what’s real and true. And that feels really good.
Kimberly: Give it a try, my love. Let’s see how you do with it, Charlotte. Keep in touch with us. But I think that if you hold that dignity and that space inside of you and connect deeper, that will up-level the conversation as well. All right, my loves. I love your questions so far. This is amazing. Living a life free of comparison is definitely available to all of us. We just have to put some focus on it and some real attention. I’m going to take a quick break. And when I get back, we have two more questions for you guys on this topic. All right, my loves.
Kimberly: We are back from our break. Two more questions on this topic that I love so much, how to live free of comparison. So that is really our goal, to live a life where we can be completely ourselves and we can feel free from attachment and needing all this stuff from other people, including needing to feel better than them, or comparing and feeling less or worse, less than, better than. It’s just a really exhausting way to go through life. We need to really connect in to ourselves.
Kimberly: This is important before we go on social media, before we go into parties or interactions with neighbors, as we just talked about in the last question, or other people that like to brag or to really talk about what they have. Maybe it’s stuff that we don’t have and that we want. So that can be triggering. The way out of that is not to buy into it and not try to compete on that level, because there’ll always be more stuff to get and more stuff, more material stuff to compare and compete with. But where no one else can compete or compare with you is on the inner space, deeper, deeper down.
Kimberly: That’s where we want to start to live more and more. And we really foster that connection with that place as we go into our daily meditation practice, which ideally would be in the morning. It would be in the evening. We have lots of free meditations for you over on the Solluna and over at our website, mysolluna.com. I encourage you to check those out and to really make that as important a part of your practice as you’re Glowing Green Smoothie®, as your SBO probiotics, as your hot water with lemon.
Kimberly: We need to really treat the inner space as important, if not more than the physical, because that’s really what’s real. Energy creates everything else. When we tune into that energy, we can amplify that energy and then it starts to just radiate out throughout our lives. And we start to really realize that the truth, which is that we are beyond comparison.
Kimberly: But if we’re on this material level and we’re not meditating and we’re not going inside, we get up in the morning, we go right into Instagram or right into Twitter, wherever we’re going, and we start seeing everything else, we start getting pulled outside of ourselves even more before we’ve had a chance to connect. And that’s a really vulnerable place to see what other people are doing and what’s going on because we haven’t connected yet with ourselves. So then that connection just starts to wear down more and more and more, and we feel more susceptible to comparison. We feel less peaceful. We feel more of that lack and that “I’m not enough and I don’t have enough,” and that’s a horrible place to live.
Kimberly: Let’s be honest. None of us want to live there. No matter how much we have or how much stuff we’ve built or created, it just starts to get diminished when we live in the place of comparison. Let’s get into the questions now, but I just want to emphasize so much that the inner world is where you go to be free of this. And the meditations are really going to save you in this regard.
Question #3 around the topic of: How to Live Free of Comparison: I’m always comparing the worst of what I know about myself to the best assumptions that I tend to make about others. Have you dealt with this, Kimberly? Any advice?
Kimberly: All right. Our next question comes from Violet and she lives in Rhode Island.
Kimberly: And she writes, “I’m always comparing the worst of what I know about myself to the best assumptions that I tend to make about others. Have you dealt with this, Kimberly? Any advice?” So, yes, I have dealt with this, Violet, and I totally get it. I send you a big virtual hug. I just want you to know that you are an amazing, beautiful, whole and unique human being, Violet, and you are on a journey, a unique journey back to truth and back to oneness. And along that journey, you’re going to have ups and downs. You’re going to experience a wide range of behaviors and feelings and emotions that play out.
Kimberly: Please don’t beat yourself up and please realize that no matter what your outer behavior is, what is intact is your worth and what is intact is your wholeness and your completeness no matter what you do. We see the best assumptions about others. What we see on social media is other people’s highlights. And even in a public space, people may show their best face and their best behavior, but we don’t know what their journey is. We don’t know what their inner space is. We don’t know what their self-talk is. We don’t know what happens behind closed doors.
Kimberly: We don’t know really about the inner workings of their relationships with their family members, their friends, whatever it is. So in this way, comparing our journey and the worst of ourselves, the best of ourselves with other people really is just a losing game. There’s no winning that game. All it does is create more shame and guilt. And again, we’re not really doing it on a level that is valid anyway, because, again, we don’t really know about someone’s journey. And our journey is so complex and so nuanced, and it can’t be judged.
Kimberly: It just really can’t be judged, because we may be moving through something. Our plan, the divine plan for us may have included great challenges and wounds to overcome, to realize that actually love is all there is. We don’t have to identify with this surface part of us or this deeper part of us. There’s hard lessons about letting go and forgiveness and letting resentments drop away and all these different things.
Kimberly: I would say, Violet, just tell yourself and over time hopefully this becomes an embodied integrated belief that you really are unique and that no one knows your full story, and you don’t know anybody else’s full story. It’s just completely useless to try to compare on that level. What I would shift to focusing on is understanding yourself more and understanding what you call the worst behaviors, what are the patterns, what are the things that trigger that within you and putting some real focus there.
Kimberly: For me, I am a recovering perfectionist, as I’ve shared with you guys many, many times, and sometimes that behavior would be quite harsh talk. Like, “Oh, why isn’t this happening with my team,” or even John, my husband, or people around. And I started to tune into that and realized, okay, that behavior that I’m not necessarily proud of afterwards when I’m snappy or whatever, it comes because I’m actually really harsh with myself. And that is the language and the self-talk that is reflected in me. When I started to analyze that, it starts…
Kimberly: First of all, I know for me it brought up some self judgment, but then moving past that to compassion and saying, “Okay, wow. That sucks. It’s been in there for awhile. Where did this come from?” It’s just like an onion, you start peeling away the layers, and this is how I’ve come to realize my deep core wound is about being seen and heard because with busy working parents, a lot of things going on in my childhood, I didn’t always feel seen and heard in my home environment. That manifests outwardly in behavior of like trying to be seen and heard with all these achievements.
Kimberly: And if things stand in the way or they feel like it’s too slow or someone’s not working hard enough, that’s when this wound rises up and it’s our behavior that can feel like lashing out or impatience or harshness or snappiness. And it doesn’t mean I’m a bad person. I shed the shame around that. I cleaned it up. I apologize if I need to, but I start to understand more and more, oh, this was the one wound I had. And we all have wounds. I’ve really healed from that, and I continue to heal.
Kimberly: So what I would say, Violet, is journaling, introspection, just reflection, which is such a huge part of our Solluna Circle, by the way, which is our membership program over in the app. You can access it. We have a live Zoom. I talk about it all the time, because I love it so much, and we have weekly audios just to keep you on point and meditations. We take a deep dive, and this deep dive every month, even for a few minutes a day, there’s chats every day and tips, it really does focus your energy on working on a part of yourself. And this is so important as we go through life.
Kimberly: If there’s one thing I’ll say is the self-work is you get out what you put in. And just spending time on our own self-work, journaling, introspection, spending time with ourselves, we allow these often subconscious programs to be brought into the light. As Carl Jung says, we bring the shadow forward, and then we can start to own it and work with it and drop behaviors that don’t serve us anymore and drop behaviors that make us feel guilty and shameful and lead to us comparing to, “Oh my gosh, this person is so amazing, and they’re so nice all the time, and all this stuff.”
Kimberly: We have all those qualities within us. We are infinitely, generous and kind and compassionate and empathetic, but sometimes we need to bring them forward and we need to drop the behaviors that block those beautiful energies from coming forward. I would say, Violet, to focus on yourself and your practices. Dial in your cornerstones. Eating, to support your body’s energy. Body-wise, moving, good sleep. Emotionally, processing your feelings journaling. And then spiritually, taking the time to sit and to breathe and to meditate.
Kimberly: And if you do that, you’ll start to understand yourself more and where those behaviors are coming from, and then also how to drop them. Thank you so much, my love. I appreciate you so much. I appreciate your beautiful, honest, vulnerable question, and I look forward to connecting with you more in our community.
Question #4 around the topic of: How to Live Free of Comparison: A colleague just got promoted for a position I was also interested in. I can’t help compare myself to her work skills and why I wasn’t chosen. How can I get past this hump so I can move forward and not dwell on negative thoughts about myself?
Kimberly: All right, guys, our next question comes from Chloe and she lives in Washington. And she writes, “A colleague just got promoted for a position I was also interested in. I can’t help compare myself to her work skills and why I wasn’t chosen. How can I get past this hump so I can move forward and not dwell on negative thoughts about myself?” Chloe, this is a big one. Thank you for this question. I think we’ve all been in a particular situation. I remember one time I didn’t win a student council race, which, again, seems like, okay, we’re 10 years old, but you can tune back in and we remember these things. Why wasn’t I picked? Why did people vote for me? Why didn’t I get this job? Why did she get picked to be the maid of honor and not me? Whatever it is. So here’s the truth, it’s not about better than or worse than.
Kimberly: It all goes back to energy. We don’t understand all the ways that energy works. Maybe this person had filled this particular need in a slightly different way. Maybe your bigger promotion is coming down the road, or maybe if you got that promotion, this would have happened instead of this. Maybe this will prompt you to shift or to go in a different direction, or maybe it’s the challenge of working out a skill in your current position, or whatever it is. We don’t know, but what needs to come off the table is comparing and looking at yourself and saying, “Oh, what’s wrong with me?”
Kimberly: There’s nothing wrong with you. It is really just the way life works sometimes, and we don’t understand everything. This is a big lesson I’ve learned is that surrender to the unknown, surrender to a greater intelligence, to the divine, to God, to the universe, whatever word you want to use. There are things in our limited human consciousness that we simply don’t understand, but we can’t make up the story. It’s very easy to create this story like “I’m not good enough. I’m not as good as her.” Blah, blah, blah. Don’t fall into that. It just is what it is.
Kimberly: Try to remain non-emotional. Try to just evaluate and say, “Oh, I guess it wasn’t my time, but maybe she’s stronger in this area. I could work on that. Or maybe I know my skill sets are equal. So for whatever reason they chose her, but I’m going to keep working on this, and these are the things I want to focus on.” Keep calling it back into yourself. Keep trying to go and connect to that deeper place beyond comparison where jobs don’t even really matter.
Kimberly: When we go down and connect to the deepest part of ourselves, we’re here and we’re using our will, and we’re creating in the world, but it doesn’t matter in terms of your worth. It doesn’t mean anything about you as a human, whether you get a job or not, or whether this person takes you or not. Everybody is on their own journey, and we can’t know their journey. We can’t know their reasons. I mean, there’s just so much that goes into play with that. It could have been this person went to the same high school as the person hiring, and they felt some sense of loyalty.
Kimberly: You can’t compete with that, right? That’s beyond your control. Where we want to so-called compete is just with ourselves and every day looking at ourselves in the mirror and thinking how can we align more to our values, to our truth, to the message that we want to bring forth in the world. And when we go off course, when we have behavior that doesn’t match up, instead of beating ourselves up, we instead just see, oh, how could I do that better tomorrow? This trigger came up for me and we look at it and we continue to learn.
Kimberly: So in this case, you could say, “Oh, I wonder what it was or if there’s anything for me to work on.” You can take a look. And if nothing really rises and if there is something that rises up, then you address it and you work on it. But if nothing really comes up over and it just feels like, oh, for whatever reason, this didn’t play out the way that you expect it, but you don’t have the reason for it, then it’s important to then come to peace with that and know in your heart that you did do your best and it just didn’t work and not this time.
Kimberly: But you’re going to keep marching forward and you’re going to keep working on yourself. And again, that’s all you can do instead of getting fixated on this colleague and going down this road of suffering and it’s the road of a lot of wasted energy. I definitely don’t recommend that. But keep calling it back in. Meditating. Do your practice. Do your practice before you go to work, before you interact with anybody there or her or your work situation, because otherwise you could go in really triggered. And it is important that we fortify ourselves. It is really important that we do our morning practice before we go into work. I’m a huge proponent of that, because we want to be in the strongest position before we are exposed to potentially challenging situations, potentially triggering situations. Thank you so much, love, for your question.
Thought of the Week
Kimberly: I think this is a big one, especially when things come up that don’t feel good to us or someone else gets picked. Just remember that it’s really not about you. This ties in with my thought of the week, which is you are beyond comparison. I’ll say it again. This could be an affirmation.
Kimberly: It could be something that you remind yourself of, but you are beyond comparison. So if you start to fall into that, you start to look around on social media, you’re like, “Eh, that person’s life is so much better. Why don’t I have this? Why don’t I have a husband yet? Why can’t I go on that retreat? Why do I not have a second home in The Hamptons,” or whatever it is, what you want to do is you want to remind yourself that the real you, you that counts, the you that is unchanging, the you that doesn’t age, the you that no matter what is going on retains its absolute value and worth, that you can not be compared.
Kimberly: Period. Keep bringing yourself back to that truth and back to that realization. It will take some retraining, but eventually you will get to that place where… I fall into comparison too. But I mean, the most part, I really do subscribe to this. This is a big belief for me to start to embody over the last few years. And I realized that I’m looking how fast other people’s businesses are growing or what they’re doing just doesn’t ever get me anywhere. It just is a path of suffering. When we realize that, we don’t want to keep going down the path that doesn’t feel good.
Kimberly: We want to start to feel better, of course. There’s a mental part of this. There’s the realization that comparison doesn’t work and knowing that, and then there’s the embodying part where we actually live it. To me, that integration comes from the cornerstones, from the constant tuning in with ourselves. It comes especially with the meditation’s day in and day out and connecting more and more. It can’t just be intellectualized. It can’t be this mental concept. It has to be practiced and experienced with that inner connection.
Kimberly: And when you tune into that light inside of you and to your soul, one day you’re just going to say, “Oh yeah, this is big. This is beyond words. This is something that really can’t be explained. This truly is beyond comparison.” And that’s the truth. So my loves, I want you to live your best life. I want you to feel your best. I want you to realize that you are a unique creation, and then to start this comparison game. Let it start to just drivel out of your life. You don’t need it anymore. I hope that some of these ideas and tips resonated with you.
Kimberly: And keep in touch with me. Let me know how you’re moving forward. Let me know other topics that you’d like to cover or questions over at mysolluna.com. We have a space where you can submit your questions, and I’m always listening, always reading everything. Thank you so much. Thank you so much for being part of our community. I send you so much love. I love you immensely. I care about you immensely and our community. I will be back here Monday for our next interview podcast. Until then, take care. See you in the app. See you on social and sending you so much.