How To Cultivate an Attitude of Letting Go and Increase Your Bliss [Episode #702]

This week’s topic is: How To Cultivate an Attitude of Letting Go and Increase Your Bliss

Letting go is really about trusting life more is about letting go of these imaginary reigns that we think we can hold onto and control life. When we create resistance, when we try to push things away, or we don’t like certain things, it’s very arduous. I can say from firsthand experience, when I started to learn more about the actual skill of letting go, that’s what I think it is.

I think it’s really a skill we’ll get into today. My life opened up in so many ways. Love opens up real security, the feelings of bliss, and joy. However, it doesn’t mean everything in your life is going to go your way. Not at all. There will be challenges, but it is true that when we let go in so many ways, things get so much better.

Have you been wondering about this very topic? If you want to know the answer to this question sent in by a Beauty just like you, listen now to find out!

Remember you can submit your questions at https://mysolluna.com/askkimberly/

[Question Answered]

Megan – California (Emotional Well Being Cornerstone)

Kimberly, I have noticed that I tend to hold onto pain and trauma from my past relationships and friendships. How do I stop this pattern in my life?

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Transcript:

Note: The following is the output of transcribing from an audio recording. Although the transcription is largely accurate, in some cases it is incomplete or inaccurate. This is due to inaudible passages or transcription errors. It is posted as an aid, but should not be treated as an authoritative record.

Kimberly: Welcome back loves and welcome to our Thursday Q&A podcast where our topic today is something that is very close to my heart. How To Cultivate an Attitude of Letting Go and Increase Your Bliss. So letting go is really about trusting life more. And it’s about letting go of these imaginary reigns that we think we can hold onto and control life. When we create resistance, when we push, try to push things away, or we don’t like certain things, and it’s very arduous. And I can say from firsthand experience, when I started to learn more about the actual skill of letting go, and that’s what I think it is. I think it’s really a skill as we’ll get into today. My life opened up in so many ways. The love opened up the real security, the feelings of bliss, as we mentioned in our title, just joy doesn’t mean everything in your life is gonna go your way.

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Kimberly: Not at all. There will be challenges, but it is true that when we let go in so many ways, things get so much better. So I really love this show today. It’s a very personal one for me, and I will share about that in just a moment, but before we get into it, just a little reminder as always, please leave us a review on apple, Spotify. It’s just a great way to support and I don’t need to go on and on, but I will say it really means a lot. It’s a beautiful energy exchange. So if you could just take a minute out of your day to do that for us, it would mean the world. So thank you in advance. Please be sure to subscribe to our show because we all get real busy and it’s just an amazing way to support yourself in this case, by just staying in the flow of information and not having to think all the time and make all these decisions, but just letting things come to you, which is part of living in flow.

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Kimberly: And also please share our show with anyone that you think would benefit a friend, a family member, a loved one because part of expansion is sharing and generosity. So you can take a screenshot, you can send a link to anyone you think would benefit. And it’s beautiful to do that as well. Last little announcement is to remind you that our new book is out our book being for the community. This one comes directly from my heart. If you haven’t checked it out yet, you will feel that. I think as you read it, quite obviously it is called You Are More More Than You Think You Are – Practical Enlightenment For Everyday Life, and you can pick it up at your local bookstore or online. And this is a pract practical guide for living your dreams. And that sounds really broad, but it’s broken down into practical steps, including clearing fear and blocks and embodying your intuition

Kimberly: And your real true self qualities. And then creating an abundance, creating magnetism, bringing things towards you and how we really do that. It’s like detoxifying the body, how we let go, which we’ll talk about a little bit today, old attachments and how we replace that with what is beneficial. So check it out. Let me know how, what you think, any questions you have. You could also leave them on this podcast questions about the book.

Question around the topic of: How To Cultivate an Attitude of Letting Go and Increase Your Bliss: Kimberly, I have noticed that I tend to hold onto pain and trauma from my past relationships and friendships. How do I stop this pattern in my life?

Kimberly: So thank you my love for all of that. Let’s get right into our question today, which comes from Megan, who lives in California and Megan writes, Kimberly. I have noticed that I tend to hold onto pain and trauma from my past relationships and friendships. How do I stop this pattern in my life? And so this is such a beautiful question, and it’s such a powerful skill to learn. How do we let go? How do we process? How do we move forward?

Kimberly: And so we all have this, or don’t say all of us, but most, most, all of us have this tendency to think that we can control things more than we can. And I don’t know if it’s growing up in the Western world and having being immersed in this culture that is really focused on doing and doing and thinking that we can do something for everything and that we can control things more than we can. And also just coming from a lot of fear in the news in the media and just being saturated in it. The opposite perspective comes from the east, particularly, and from these teachings, from the Bagga Vata, which I talk about so much, but also from all faiths and all traditions, whether we’re talking about the, the Sikh I used to think it was Sikh, but then we had an amazing guest come on here, uh, recently, um, and Simran and talk about this.

Kimberly: He would say Sikh, but talk about this idea of love and oneness from the sick perspective. And also we go back to Christianity and the teachings of Jesus, which is where my roots come from, where I was raised, and just this idea of moving past fear and into a greater sense of trust. And then we go to quantum physics where this interconnected energy runs through everything. And so we realize more and more as we contemplate these deeper truths until we start to live them and they become realizations, which is where letting go is, it’s a truth in practice. We can realize more and more that we don’t have to try to dig in and control and push things away and create resistance, which is really about attachment. And we can be attached to socks. We can be attached to patterns. We can be attached to our ancestral beliefs, meaning the ways in which our grandparents and our parents pass on these beliefs to us that aren’t really ours.

Kimberly: We can still attach to them and live out these patterns or the opposite of that, or the, the choice that we can make is to live more and more in this flow of letting go. But part of letting go means we let things in, and then we let them go. So let’s talk about that a little bit and thank you again so much, Megan, for this question, because a lot of us have this holding on. So let’s, I wanna talk about it in terms of food first, which I think is a very physical way <laugh> that we can think about things. And sometimes it’s easier to think about the physical, and then we can translate it to this topic. So if we hold on, let’s say we eat something that’s a little bit heavier. Let’s say it’s a cheeseburger, right?

Kimberly: If our bodies hold onto it, it stays in our bellies for longer. It means that our digestive secretions are inefficient in breaking it down. So it starts to ferment and petrify prematurely. There’s the release of gases. We get bloated, we’re still holding onto it. It’s blocked at a certain point in the pathway of our GI tract, but it’s not actually flowing through. So this actually causes more pain, more suffering. Literally, we feel that gassiness feels very uncomfortable. And so instead, what we could do is we could choose to enjoy that cheeseburger, or we could choose not to have the cheeseburger in the first place, but let’s say we do choose to have it. We would make up our mind to not beat ourselves up. We would say, okay, this is once in a while, I’m gonna enjoy this. We would not have the drudgery, the mental, the shame associated with it.

Kimberly: We would take three, Feel Good Solluna Digestive Enzymes. First to help us digest it. We would drink ginger tea later. We would try to eat lighter. We would let it in, and then we would let it through. We would take detox hopefully also in the evening and just promote the, the letting go process. So we can see that even with challenging things, there is this choice we can make to let it in, and then we let it out. So I think part of the reason that we don’t, we don’t let the pain go is because we don’t fully let it in. We don’t let ourselves feel that deep discomfort. And so it doesn’t get really fully and efficiently metabolized.

Kimberly: It sort of stays stagnant at some point in our beings. So I can say for me with the grief of losing my mom, an example, I’ve talked about here before I really let it in. So it was like a tidal wave where I didn’t really have a choice. I remember having this conversation with the doctors and they would say, okay, this is the reality. And I had to step up to it because it was really difficult for my dad. I, my Emerson, my oldest son wasn’t even a year old. So I had to really face it. I had to be the one talking to the doctors. And so it was like this tidal wave and just so emotional at first, the crying, the pain and everything was moving really quickly. I had to make decisions. She was fading quickly and consciousness. This is over a period of just a few weeks.

Kimberly: And so I felt it so intensely. And then it started to move through and then ways would continue to come. And they still come to this day, but it moves through. And the big challenges I’ve had since then also I’ve taken this perspective of letting it in. And then I’ve also seen times in my own life where I try to resist something like, I don’t really want this to happen, so I’m gonna try to push it away. I’m gonna try to control life around this. I don’t want this. I don’t want that. I don’t want this person around or whatever it is. And that actually makes things stickier. It makes things more dense. It creates what the GATA talks about, attachment, where we lose what the GATA says, purity of heart. The purity of heart comes from when we really just open up to life. And we start to develop this very important quality of trust. Trust that there is a bigger picture that somehow whether our beliefs, you know, depending on our beliefs, it could be the universe, the quantum physics, energetics God spirit source, which is where I personally go.

Kimberly: It’s we trust? And this trust has to come from intuition. And this is a big theme this month. And the Solluna Circle of being in flow, intuition builds from meditation. It builds from interconnection. And so the more we keep anchoring inside saying, oh my gosh, life is so unpredictable. It’s so chaotic. There’s so much craziness out there. The news is crazy and there’s a lot of pain that can come from relationships, but I don’t put all my eggs in that basket. I don’t look to my loved ones to give me all this safety and security. I actually trust that there’s something bigger and I trust myself and the true self, this energy and the security that’s inside of me, then it becomes easier to let things in and let things out and to remain in this more expansive consciousness of detachment. So when I start to feel that creeping in, of

Kimberly: Holding on resistance, I don’t want this. It it’s because we’re zeroing in and we’re creating rigidity and we’re really focusing in, and it actually does make things much, much harder. So what I suggest Megan is number one, take in this information, contemplate it, check out a solocast. I did recently about thriving, continuing to thrive after challenging circumstances, which goes a little deeper. Number two, do your daily meditation practice do it as soon as you can before you, right after you wake up. So you can direct the flow of your energy. And remember that we have free guided meditations for you over@mysolona.com that, and also the Solluna app, which is free, which I highly recommend. Number three, notice when you feel, Ooh, tight rigid, the same feelings coming up. And I say a simple reminder to myself. You can call it a mantra. I usually think of mantras framed in the I am form, but the simple thing I tell myself is zoom out, zoom out.

Kimberly: I’m getting too fixated. I’m getting too locked in here. So zoom out, expand, let go. Think of the bigger picture. Right? I just zoom out. I let my energy go wider. And number four, I bring in gratitude. So it’s easier to let go when we think about, oh, but look at all the blessings, look at all the love in my life. Look at all this amazingness. And that is moisturizing. I find it’s hydrating to the sticky, the, the, um, the way I think of it, energetically, it’s almost like crackly and britle right. The letting go just as, uh, or when we hold on, it just starts to feel so dehydrated. And so it’s very nourishing to just think of gratitude, which feels really gentle, feels really soothing. It feels this beautiful water equality, almost mixed in, and just letting everything nurture and expand. So I really, um, recommend going through these steps and what happens is over time in this period of 40 days, which is mentioned in our UIC medicine, it’s mentioned in Kini yoga to cycle of change. We see that with Moses in the desert, in Jesus, and there’s many times this number 40 comes up. So if we put extra focus on, where am I tight, where am I rigid, really getting consistent in our meditations, letting things through for 40 days, it will become easier after that. So if you wanna go further in this topic, I also invite you as I did in the solocast to come into our Solluna Circle, which is such a nurturing community for really supporting each other and going deeper into flow, deeper

Kimberly: Into letting go as a lifestyle, which will open up the bliss and the joy in your life so much more. So also please head over to mysolluna.com for show notes. There is an interesting study that I wanna point out from 2010, um, this that talked about an actual scale of non-attachment and what the researchers found was decreased symptoms of depression, anxiety, and stress through empathy, kindness, and letting go through detachment. So this was actually studied in research. And so we find that non-attachment, as a lifestyle helps with mental health, it helps with self actualization. And it also shows that non-attachment is stronger in those who meditate. So very practically grounding it in some research head over there, also link to art, other articles, other podcasts, recipes, very important for practical living, meditations, other things to support you on your journey. And on this particular topic, I’ll be back here Monday for our next interview podcast to then take great care, sending you so much love, and I am so grateful for you and our connection Namaste.