Getting Unstuck [Episode #500]

This week’s topic is: Getting Unstuck

Our topic today is a really interesting topic because we can get stuck in any of the cornerstones, which are food, body, emotional wellbeing, and spiritual growth. We can feel stuck in our bodies. We can feel stagnant in our work or our progress to feel lighter and happier and more peaceful. We can feel stuck in our relationships.

I don’t think there’s any single one of us that don’t feel stuck from time to time, including myself, and I want to talk about some of the practices and tools that I personally use to get through that stuckness and get to the other side.

Have you been wondering about this very topic? If you want to know the answer to this question and 3 more sent in by Beauties just like you, listen now to find out!

Remember you can submit your questions at https://mysolluna.com/askkimberly/

[Questions Answered]

Erin – Las Vegas 

I’ve been following you for quite some time now, and I absolutely love your philosophy. I’m beginning to realize the connection between weight gain and emotional blocks. I seem to hold a lot of weight in my thighs and hips. More importantly, my lower half feels heavy, as if I’m pulled downward, and I want to feel lighter. What type of emotional blockage may I be experiencing in those areas?

Cara – Portland, OR 

There is so much about your personal story that I relate to. I just lost my mom a month ago. I am separated from my husband heading toward divorce. I have no children and struggled with infertility when I was trying to conceive. Literally nothing in my life is the way I thought it would be at almost 33 years old. I guess my question is, what is your advice on how to let go of the vision that I had for my life and move on to find happiness?

Andrea – Amarillo 

I have been doing the radiant beauty eating for over a month now. I have always had trouble with regularity and even after eating like this I still am having trouble. I just got your probiotics and have been taking them for about a week and am still not seeing much difference. What can I do? I’m eating perfectly! Thanks so much for your help and all you do.

Alyssa – Barrie, Ontario

I am so interested in spirituality and everything that comes along with it but as a science major I find it difficult to disconnect from scientific thinking and pour my heart and soul into spirituality.

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Inspirational Thought of the Week

When life doesn’t work with us, then we have to work with life.

[RESOURCES]

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Other Podcasts you may enjoy!:

• Breaking Through Old Habits and Fears!
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• Big Life Changes
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Transcript:

Note: The following is the output of transcribing from an audio recording. Although the transcription is largely accurate, in some cases it is incomplete or inaccurate. This is due to inaudible passages or transcription errors. It is posted as an aid, but should not be treated as an authoritative record.

Kimberly: 00:01 Hi Beauties. Welcome back to our Thursday Q and A podcast where I love to hear all your questions, what you’re wondering, how I can further support you. And our topic today is getting unstuck, and this is a really interesting topic because we can get stuck in any of the cornerstones, which are food, body, emotional wellbeing, and spiritual growth. We can feel stuck in our bodies. We can feel stagnant in our work or our progress to feel lighter and happier and more peaceful. We can feel stuck in our relationships. So this is a really big topic I think. I don’t think there’s any single one of us that don’t feel stuck from time to time, including myself, and I want to talk about some of the practices and tools that I personally use to get through that stuckness and get to the other side.

Kimberly: 00:53 A lot of the times it could just be a perspective shift. It could be taking a break, it could be a particular practice. It could be an awareness that we build. It could be a strategy, it could be a food. So I’d love to hear the variety of questions that we have around this topic. So let’s get right into it. I do have Baby Moses/Mr. Eggy on my lap right now while I’m doing this, so I do hope that he stays quiet. But if you hear little baby whimpers you know who it’s coming from. He is my cohost today. Katelyn is actually on vacation. So I’m going to be doing this show all by myself, which is nice. I get to read your questions. And I will say that we’re thinking about having you guys say your questions to me. I’m not a tech person, but there’s some sort of system where you could maybe leave a voice recording or some way where I can also hear your voice so it feels like more of a two way conversation, and I’m really looking forward to that.

Leave a Review and Subscribe on Itunes

Kimberly: 01:58 I definitely miss being with you guys, whether it’s in person circles or events, speaking, books signings, whatever. So I think this will be a really cool thing for us to all have as a community. Before I jump in, just a quick reminder, please leave us a review on iTunes. It’s a great way to support the podcast and to help our community grow, and for other beauties like yourself to find this information and to find this hopefully what feels like a very warm, fuzzy, authentic community, which is my goal.

Question 1: I’ve been following you for quite some time now and I absolutely love your philosophy. I’m beginning to realize the connection between weight gain and emotional blocks. I seem to hold a lot of weight in my thighs and hips. More importantly, my lower half of my body feels heavy, as if I’m being pulled downward. And I want to feel lighter. What type of emotional blockage may I be experiencing in those areas?

Kimberly: All right, all that being said, let’s head into our first question. And this comes from Erin in Las Vegas, and she writes, “I’ve been following you for quite some time now and I absolutely love your philosophy. I’m beginning to realize the connection between weight gain and emotional blocks. I seem to hold a lot of weight in my thighs and hips. More importantly, my lower half of my body feels heavy, as if I’m being pulled downward. And I want to feel lighter. What type of emotional blockage may I be experiencing in those areas?”

Kimberly: 03:02 Erin, thank you so much for your question, Beauty. Thanks for writing in. I send you a huge hug in Vegas. I bet it’s super hot there right now, but I’m someone that likes the heat so I hope you are having a great summer so far and I send you lots and lots of love. So back to your question, and I’m glad you vibe with the philosophy. I’m glad you’ve been with me on the journey. Those of you that have also been with me on the journey have seen the expansion where from my first book, The Beauty Detox Solution, I look back on it now and I could see that it was when I was beginning my yoga practice and I was starting to really go deep into shifting my philosophy, and it was coming through in the book and talking about things like beauty energy and getting past numbers, but I hadn’t integrated everything yet. I was still really excited about food, really thinking food was the end all be all.

Kimberly: 03:59 I’m still excited about food. But, again, I start to see that the philosophy that I was applying to food goes so much more beyond. It really goes into our whole lifestyle and the way that we are, which ties into Erin’s question about weight gain and emotional blocks. So our minds, our feelings, our emotions are like directors that set off a trajectory of processes and expressions in the physical world that very much manifest in our body. So fear, for instance, the way that it arrests our nervous system and slows down our digestion, thereby directly compounding bloating, and relating to weight gain is a way that this weight gain and emotions are connected. Our minds, our feelings literally inform hormones and the way that they’re secreted. It really affects everything from our nervous system, endocrine system, immune system, our energy levels, so on and so forth.

Kimberly: 05:08 What book was it? I think it was Beauty Detox Power, my third book, where I started talking about fear and weight gain and holding on, and we know that fat is very insulative, it keeps us warm, there is a fat component to the myelin sheaths which lie in our nervous system. So we know that there is a protective element to fat. And there was a really interesting study that I found for that book where people that were put in a facility, obese people, that were really given the bare amount of calories to sustain their temperature, they continued to gain weight. And this was unexplained by classic Newtonian science and it was just this crazy phenomenon unless you really understand energy and you understand that fat and holding onto weight can be a protective element.

Kimberly: 06:05 This goes back to where I really believe in energy. I really go to the yogic way of looking at things, which is more about quantum physics, more expansive than just the straight Western approach, shall we say, which is where, I know for myself, when I stopped beating myself up and hyper-focusing on my thighs and I started accepting myself more and living my life, the weight started to naturally peel off in a much, much, much easier way. So I think we hold onto weight when we feel small, when we are trying to hide ourselves, when we’re not showing our most brilliant light, when we’re carrying some shame about ourselves or about things we’ve done or aspects of our personality. And the more we can move through that like water in a loving way, this whole shamanic idea of transformation by sitting with your whole self, sitting with your shadow, sitting with the dark, what happens is that we create more lightness in our being.

Kimberly: 07:08 And Erin, I do think that a lot of the weight and the heaviness in the lower half of the body has to do with fear of moving forward and different aspects of that. So you think about your hips and your knees and your legs and your thighs, they are carrying you forward, you’re stepping forward into life. And if there’s fear of the unknown or just trying to cling and trying to control what’s happening in our lives, what happens is we can create a lot of holding, a lot of blockage, energy in that lower half of our body.

Kimberly: 00:01 So for anyone experiencing difficulty losing weight, and especially in the lower part of your body, of course, we want to look at the physicality of what we’re eating, how we’re exercising, how our digestion is, making sure we’re taking probiotics, doing all these things that fall into our first and second cornerstone, food and body. But the stuckness, if you’re still doing those things and you’re still feeling bloated, and you’re still feeling sluggish, and you’re still feeling heavy, I can almost guarantee that there is an emotional component, which is tied to the spiritual part, because the spiritual component is about freedom and stillness and nature, and being part of nature, and meditating, and finding all these ways to connect in with the essence of who you are. The emotional part is the blocks that keep us from fully connecting, or the ways that we process and accept ourselves in the full range of emotions.

Kimberly: 00:58 So I recommend, Erin, of course, meditating, working on these two cornerstones, meditating, finding time to spend with yourself, some of the practices we teach in our Solluna Circle online, and journaling, and finding a really great way to just express yourself freely and authentically, to really talk to yourself through the process, or with a friend or a therapist. Really identify fears that you have and what may be keeping you moving forward, whether it’s fear of not being enough, not being good enough, not having enough, not being smart enough, and you can start to really identify these patterns.

Kimberly: 01:37 Now, I just did a video on journaling and emotional well-being that is in our Instagram TV. I recommend you guys watch it. My channel is at _KimberlySnyder. We also have a Solluna one, which is at SollunabyKS, but this one’s on the Kimberly Snyder one. I did it for actually Deepak Chopra’s channel, but I saved it and then we re-posted it. So it’s all about this exercise of between talking through fear and truth and wisdom back and forth with yourself, and how you can get past to a point of balance and acceptance, and let go of the heaviness that you don’t need any more. The heaviness feels like it’s protective. It feels like it’s a way, but it’s actually keeping you stuck and stagnant and keeping you from moving forward in a more easeful way.

Kimberly: 02:26 Erin, awesome, awesome question. I can talk about this all day, but check out that video and continue with these practices and see what progress you’ll make. I didn’t change overnight, but I can say, again, when I started opening up to emotional well-being and spiritual growth, my body really changed and the weight came off, and it was an amazing side effect that I was not expecting, but definitely did happen as well.

Question 2: There is so much about your personal story that I relate to. I just lost my mom a month ago. I’m separated from my husband and headed towards divorce. I have no children and struggled with infertility when I was trying to conceive. Literally, nothing in my life is the way I thought it would be at almost 33 years old. I guess, my question is what is your advice on how to let go of the vision I had for my life and move on to find happiness?

Kimberly: 02:54 Next question comes from Kara in Portland, Oregon, and she writes, “There is so much about your personal story that I relate to. I just lost my mom a month ago. I’m separated from my husband and headed towards divorce. I have no children and struggled with infertility when I was trying to conceive. Literally, nothing in my life is the way I thought it would be at almost 33 years old. I guess, my question is what is your advice on how to let go of the vision I had for my life and move on to find happiness?”

Kimberly: 03:24 Kara, I’m sitting here reading your question and I’m getting so many goosebumps up and down my arms. So, first of all, thank you for your amazing, authentic question with so much heart in it and so much rawness and realness. I definitely had a very similar situation to you. It’s like a crazy time. I lost my mom very suddenly, or within six weeks, and then it just split open my life and I ended up moving out on my own with Bobby. A lot of my life just felt like it was in shambles. I was trying to keep things together. Bubby wasn’t even yet … or he was one when my mom passed, so a little bit after that when I moved out. I remember going into the closet because I didn’t want him to hear me, even though his crib was across the house. It wasn’t a big house though. But I remember going into the closet and crying to myself on the floor. This little walk-in closet that I had and just feeling that way, Kara, like, “What the F is happening with my life? And this sucks and I don’t want it to be like this.” So there was all this resistance and sadness, and all around this idea of disappointed expectations.

Kimberly: 04:59 So I had some advice from this monk who, his name is Brother Chidananda, and he’s actually the one that married John and I, my husband now. He is a monk at Lake Shrine, south part of the Self-Realization Fellowship, which is the meditation center and organization started by Yogananda that I personally go to and follow. I go there to meditate. Anyways, I met with him and he said, “For the next few months,” it’s like decide three months, five months, I ended up doing it for five months … Kara, maybe you want a smaller amount of time, what feels right to you … But he said, “Spend the next few months just resetting yourself and don’t worry about the future. Don’t be trying to find a new partner. Don’t go out trying to meet someone. You’re in a very vulnerable position right now. Don’t worry about having more kids, or what you’re going to do, where are you going to live. Just spend the next few months on yourself,” and that’s what I did.

Kimberly: 06:04 I literally … My home was like an ashram. I barely went out for five months. I didn’t go to dinner very much. I literally meditated. I took care of myself. I cooked. I lived a very simple life. I read a lot of books. I did a lot of meditating. I really dove into my practice, and I got back on my feet. I let myself feel everything. I felt the pain, the disappointment, the sadness, the anger, the unfairness, resentment bubbling up in me. I just sat with myself and I processed. Then what happened on the other side of that was I started getting back on my feet, and I started to feel how resilient I was for having gone through all this. Just as you, Kara, will feel your resilience, having gone through all these struggles that you’ve gone through.

Kimberly: 06:55 I started just living from this place of almost like I’ve hit rock bottom. There’s nowhere else to go. So it’s cool, I’m just here, I’m just doing it, and there was this lightness that came through. I dissolved a lot of this having things look a certain way, embarrassment, and time frames. I just was myself. It’s hard to explain, but I just kind of let go because I had hit rock bottom. So I was just strong, strengthened by this time of really working on myself. Then when I emerged, I started going out again. I was just being in the world. After some time, there was a short relationship, just someone I met at a birthday party I dated briefly, and it wasn’t the right vibe, but he’s a great guy. I just kept floating along and then, boom, at a dinner party, I ended up meeting my soul mate, Jon, current husband, amazing. We just knew right away within 15 minutes, minute later … or, he knew within 15 minutes. It took me about a week, but we knew that we were for each other, and we are very happy.

Kimberly: 08:18 Now, I’m so grateful, so happy that we had baby Moses together, and so life goes on. I say this not to be like, “Oh, everything’s always a fairytale.” But I will say that if I had not gone through those struggles, if I had stayed in my previous relationship, which I very well might have had this whole thing not cracked open with my mom and all this stuff, I wouldn’t be where I am today, which is much more confident, much more accepting of myself; much, much happier with the partner that I feel really complete with. Now, the other people I was with are amazing guys, just not my guy. I want to get that straight. So it’s not about other people. It’s just about what resonates with you.

Kimberly: 09:12 So what I would say to you, Kara, is even though right now, you’re just like, “Oh God, this sucks. Like what is going on with my life?” Remember trust. Trust, sister, trust. You will see that when you look back on this, this is where you got your strength. This is where you got your feet under you and you started to relax into your own power and just work on yourself for a while. Don’t worry about everything. There’s all sorts of things that we can do for when you’re ready to down the road for finding new ways to connect with your body and enhance fertility and things like that; when you are ready, if and when you want to have children down the road. But don’t worry about that right now. Don’t worry about getting remarried. Work on yourself. Build that inner energy like I did, and then all this outside stuff will start to attract and shape to your life from your energy. So your energy is the starting place.

Kimberly: 10:21 Really recommend a lot of getting into a meditation practice, Kara. Sit with yourself, go in nature, and, of course, we have lots of free meditations and the Solluna Circle, all sorts of offerings over at mysolluna.com, that I encourage you to check out. I love you. Oh my God, we’re soul sisters. We have such a similar journey, and even if you, beauty, listening to this, doesn’t have the exact same set of occurrences, of course, we all have struggles right now, so whatever you’re going through, to have that set amount of time. I do recommend putting a time frame on it. Otherwise, it could just feel like, “Oh, I’m going to dip in and out, and maybe I’ll start getting online dating and do this.” No, no. Set a time frame. It could be one month, three months, or, for me, five months, and really stick to that and give yourself that nourishing time. I promise, in the end, it will be the best time you spent.

Kimberly: 11:12 Whew. All right, amazing. I love you, guys. I’m going to have a short break and I’ll be back here shortly.

Break

Kimberly: 11:23 All right, Beauties. We are back from our short break and we have two more questions for you guys on this topic of getting unstuck.

Question 3: I’ve been doing the Radiant Beauty Program Eating for over a month now. I’ve always had trouble with regularity and even eating like this, I’m still having trouble. I’ve just got your probiotics and I’m taking them for about a week and I’m still not seeing much of a difference. What can I do? I’m eating perfectly. Thank you so much for your help and all you do.

The next question comes from Andrea in Amarillo, and she writes: “I’ve been doing the Radiant Beauty Program Eating for over a month now. I’ve always had trouble with regularity and even eating like this, I’m still having trouble. I’ve just got your probiotics and I’m taking them for about a week and I’m still not seeing much of a difference. What can I do? I’m eating perfectly. Thank you so much for your help and all you do.”

Kimberly: 11:59 Andrea, thank you for your question. Thank you for taking us to a more physical part. So we’re talking about poop. We’re talking about regularity. We’re talking about the flow of digestion. We’re talking about cornerstones one and two, food and body. Here’s where this all comes full circle. I am very proud of you. Thank you for taking care of yourself and eating perfectly, but that is only cornerstone one. Now, we have body, emotional well-being, and spiritual growth, and in any of those categories you could be having blocks that are keeping you from releasing.

Kimberly: 12:41 Now, it’s wonderful that you’re taking the probiotics and I encourage you to keep taking them because it is, one, if not the most important supplement to take long-term. I never skipped my probiotics. Even if I’m busy, even if I’m exhausted, I’ll shove two of those in my mouth before bed if I forget. I will not forget probiotics because they are the foundation for balance and vitality throughout your entire being.

Kimberly: 13:05 But let me recommend, Andrea, to please also take Detoxy, which is the supplement that we carry, which is based in Asc2-P, vitamin C, and oxygen, and it helps to cleanse your whole system out. It is non-laxative, non-habit forming, but it will help to release more waste from your system. This is important because when you start eating the Radiant Beauty way, and there’s so much more fiber, and you shifted your diet, a lot of toxins and a lot of waste can come into the center of your bowels, into your GI tract, and we need some help, some aid to help move it along, and Detoxy would also be really, really wonderful for that.

Kimberly: 13:49 Now, I want to go back to what you said earlier, which is, “I have always had trouble with regularity.” So let me tell you something. I had always had trouble regularity too, Andrea. I was always consistently constipated. So what I will say to that is that there is an emotional component to constipation where we may have trouble letting go. It means we may not let go of resentments, beating ourselves up, shame, over-processing past experiences, whatever it is. There may be this holding on energy that’s running through your life, and that can affect your ability to effectively go to the bathroom. It’s actually all related.

Kimberly: 14:28 So I started realizing when I was doing my inner work how rigid I could be, how … This was also related to my perfectionism, stuck on deadlines, stuck on time frames, and when I started to release all that, I started to go to the bathroom. Yes, I was changing my diet. Yes, I was taking Detoxy, but I think it all fits together. So that’s one area I would encourage you to look at, Andrea, besides taking Detoxy. Thank you. Thank you. Lots of love. Thank you for sending in your question.

Question 4: I am so interested in spirituality and everything that comes along with it. But as a science major, I find it difficult to disconnect from scientific thinking and pour my heart and soul into spirituality.

Kimberly: 15:00 Finally, we have a question from Alyssa in Barrie, Ontario. Hello, beautiful Canuck, Canadian. My husband is also Canadian. He is originally from Montreal. She writes, “I am so interested in spirituality and everything that comes along with it. But as a science major, I find it difficult to disconnect from scientific thinking and pour my heart and soul into spirituality.” Alyssa, I really love this question. I think this is something that a lot of us struggle with when we’ve been born into this life style of Newtonian physics and science, and, especially as a science major and the whole scientific method of proving things is something that’s drilled into you. Whereas spirituality is about love, and it’s about trust, and it’s about faith, and it’s about things that you feel and experience rather than just straight book learning.

Kimberly: 16:06 So what I would encourage you, Alyssa, is to experience spirituality versus trying to dissect it and understand it through the lens of science, which is part of your work. I want you to have the experience, and it means that you can do both. You can be a scientist and you can also be spiritual. In the film Awake, which is a documentary of Yogananda’s life, there’s this amazing doctor, and forgive me, I have spaced on her name. I think it’s Dr. Ana something. You’ll see. She is in the documentary and she is actually, I believe, a physicist and a medical doctor out of Harvard. She writes how meditation, especially the teachings of Yogananda, which are Kriya Yoga, is very satisfying for a scientific appetite because it’s laid out in a very specific way and the steps of the meditation and what you do. Yogananda goes so far as to identify what takes place in the body, and how your breath starts to slow down as your nervous system starts to ease, and what goes on with your blood flow, and so on and so forth.

Kimberly: 17:30 So two things, again, number one, I would invite you to experience spirituality through meditation, through sitting in nature, not through words, but just staring at a tree and contemplating the essence, the divine intelligence that made all this. Sitting with yourself, feeling your breath. We do have guided free meditations as well over at mysolluna.com, you can check out. Secondly, I would check out that film Awake. I would see what other scientists are saying and how they are reconciling between science and faith, and the way that finding Kriya Yoga or a type of meditation that is very systematic may feel really good to you as a scientist.

Kimberly: 18:18 But I’ll say that, instead of getting stuck on trying to see everything through the same lens, the same logic, realize you are like a peacock with a million colors, a million different paints to work with. So one part of your life you can be that scientist, and another part of your life you can experience and feel, and feel your body, and feel the experience, and let go of the analytical science. That is the way to open your heart and your soul into spirituality. I love this question, too, Alyssa, and I love you. Thank you for being part of our community. I think it’s beautiful to bring heart into science and to bring new energy and new perspectives as well to the future of scientists.

Thought of the Week

Kimberly: 19:10 So I will leave us today also with one thought of the week, which is actually a quote from my last book Recipes for Your Perfectly Imperfect Life. It popped into my head randomly, and I wrote it down. “When life doesn’t work with us, then we have to work with life.” So this relates to our theme, of course, about stuckness. Stuckness also emotionally and mentally also comes when we expect things to look a certain way, when we want ourselves and our bodies to look a certain way, when we want the outcome to be a certain way, and when it doesn’t line up, then we can feel defeated or we can feel exhausted. We start to feel stuck. So instead of having such a rigid way of wanting outcomes to be, what I encourage you is to be like water, to go with the flow, to show up as yourself, to be open, and in openness is flow and flow is the opposite of stuckness.

Kimberly: 20:12 So I’ll leave you with that thought. Think about where you can be more open. Think about where you can let go of expectations, where you can let go of control, and just be yourself, be in your power, and see how life shifts and adjusts, and maybe it doesn’t look exactly how you thought it would look. My life does not look like how I thought it was going to look, but you know what? It’s way more wonderful than anything I could have imagined, and I wouldn’t have gotten here if I wasn’t open. It doesn’t mean everything’s perfect because I still have struggles and lots of things I need to work on and work through. But I will say I feel connected to myself and I feel connected to my lifestyle and my life right now in ways I didn’t before. The way out is through and the way through being stuck is to let go and to be open, and to invite that expansive energy to come into your life. It’s possible for me. It’s definitely possible for you.

Kimberly: 21:11 I love you. I send you lots and lots of love. I will see you back here Monday for our next interview podcast. Till then, sending you so much love and see you back here soon.